DOJ

Work has started for a week. I'm interning with the Department of Justice, under the Legal Policy division, Basic Law unit.

First day, met with my boss who's a high rank government official as well as a barrister. "Wondered why you're chosen, since you're not the best student?" I bloody know I'm not the best student...I felt my ego slightly assaulted but in the split second while I had to adjust my emotion and come up with a polite response, I realised it was a good chance to face this blunt yet accurate description of reality, yes I'm not the best student, or not even one of the best. He was being precise, displaying what an experienced barrister should talk like I believe....

I was chosen by him because he saw in my resume I sing in opera chorus and he happens to be a fan of my opera chorus boss and he happens to have watched me on stage, tho he hadn't knew me back then. I nearly sacrificed my academic record for this opera last Christmas! Who would have known what the opera would give me in return - a special memorable life experience, singing technique courses, new friends and a job.

I'm going to have to skip because time is short. Over the past few weeks I have so much I want to say, about work, family and my future. Workload in DOJ is very manageable since I'm an intern only. I have my own room, a desk and a computer, a quiet little corner for myself, and I get a lot of time to think (daydream).

Boss told me I wouldn't be getting a lot of work here and that the main aim of me coming here is to get exposure. Very nicely put, and also very true. Exposure is what we students need. What can they expect us to do? Bookworms with little practical experience.

First two days were interesting. Got a case in High Court the offence of homosexual buggery was challenged by a male homosexual applicant as unconstitutional for sexual orientation discrimination. Gained plenty of exposure, to prominent barristers and would be barristers, only that these people I'd already known personally. Well ok I'm just being harsh, I really did appreciate that court experience. It was an important case and I had a chance to meet some old friends from the barristers' chamber 2 years ago.

Third day, I gained much more exposure.............to air, and which resulted in my developing a condition of hypothermia with the government offices apparently not sticking to the widely publicised government recommendation of 25 degrees for the air-con. Basically sat there and meditated for a day. Dora's immediate comment upon hearing my saying "exposure to air" was that I'm a person "inherently harsh". For days I haven't been able to forget about this phrase and every once in a while my memory recalls it to amuse myself. I like it for being descriptive and to-the-point. Newman said that something is harsh because it is precise and attacks the wound, possessing this inherently harsh and mean character I almost believed that I would make a very successful barrister~

Seriously, through my LLB life, I have to admit that I'm not a very smart student, I don't feel confident enough of my ability. What I did learn, which I have come to appreciate only recently, are my weaknesses as a student in learning, and my strengths in live Q & A and presentation situations, and I believe it is the later that would be of much help in my future. The weaknesses I learnt about myself I will try my best to improve on them.

More to come:

hectic life rehearsals
vocal cords aging
career
family
plan to go abroad

Procrastination v Indulgence

I am the procrastination queen.

As I was again subconsciously worrying about things I've been procrastining, the idea of indulgence came up my mind, and I thought, damn I'm indulging in procrastination! Second thought, shouldn't indulgence a composite part of procrastination?

Productivity these two days have been satisfactory, but there is still room for improvement.

Learning to face life positively, learning to relax while I constantly try to increase my working efficiency, when my ambition in my dimly lit career plan and my extremely un-economical and time consuming interests/activities develop. Why am I being so difficult to myself?

Very often I just want to sit down, relax, do nothing a enjoy myself. When can I do this if not now, when I'm having summer vacation?! But all I've been doing is occupying myself with work! This is a serious disorder that's facing millions of people in Hong Kong. You feel guilty when you're not working. What the??!??!?!

Don't know why......

I haven't set up this blog to write about him. It just happens that he's one of the greatest drives for me to actually come to the computer, sit down and write something during these busy days. Last time I wrote something about my career (career plan to be precise...) and family and halfway I abandoned it, for reasons I don't even want to remmeber.

Shit. I miss him. I don't know I just have some affection I need to release to whoever it is or whether my affection is specific. To avoid trouble I hope it's the later.

I can't believe i even have time to trouble myself over this when i'm so busy these days!!

I need to concentrate on my work!!!

oh by the way i'm so glad i've developed a new interest - salsa. This is a new goal of mine. The other new goal/interest is the stock market. I'll have to understand it at least.

Life is hard.